CHAPTER 5
“Johnny how are things going?” his father’s voice rang loud
in Johnny’s ears while he attempted to regain his senses after reading the
damning critical review of his album “My Universe”. He felt like he was spinning downward into a drain and his
thoughts went blank on what to say next to his father. “Johnny are you
there?! What has happened?” Johnny
sat down on the bed again and uttered out a weak “things are fine father”. Johnny sat still as his father
told him that he wanted concrete proof that his album had a positive response
after the media release or Johnny would, for his own good, be cut off
completely. These were word Johnny
did not expect to hear and he was numbing further as he realized what his
fate might now turn to. Without his father’s money Johnny had nothing. If his
father cut him off he would be literally penniless.
He began to cry pleading with his father to not do this
terrible ghastly thing to him. But Johnny’s father remained firm detailing the
timing of events that would cut his money off for good to make sure his son
understood when the fateful day would come. Johnny’s father was still trying to
hold hope that Johnny would be able to make something happen and he could
renege on his decision to cut Johnny off. But he knew this was for the best and
if he never did this Johnny would never be a real man. He was disgusted that Johnny was
begging and crying over it and this further confirmed that he needed to take this step. He
believed firmly that what he was doing was his duty as a father.
Johnny’s father gave him three weeks to get a job or prove
that something positive was happening on his album effort. But even though
Johnny tried everything to get a positive musical review all the critics that agreed to review it agreed that his album “My Universe” was a total failure and
lacked musical merit of any kind. His singing was damned relentlessly. Of
course Johnny didn’t try to get a job at all during the three weeks that
passed.
When the end came Johnny had to be removed from the hotel by
the police and he was thrown in the street in the back entrance of the hotel.
He attempted to extend his stay but his father had notified the hotel that he
would no longer pay for the charges and after a short time they tired of his
excuses for lack of payment and kicked him out.
When Johnny stood in the alley looking down at his bags in
front of him dirtied from hitting the dark wet ground he realized his situation
finally was real. He had lost everything! He had no money, no credit cards,
nothing but bags of clothes and shoes. He had lost his entire identity.
For weeks he walked the streets of Berlin eventually selling
his clothes and shoes to survive until he was down to one small bag.
Occasionally when he saw someone he knew from his clubbing days they quickly
walked away as soon as they recognized him. Most of them were happy to see him
in this condition because his cockiness and superior attitude were abominable
to everyone Johnny met; but his money kept their opinions in check until his
money ran out. Now that he had no
money their truth could be shown.
Eventually Johnny was pushed by law enforcement to the areas
where the degenerate lifestyles were allowed to exist. Drug addicts,
prostitutes and criminals ruled this small set of city blocks on the farthest
east side of Berlin. A small enclave that the locals left in ruins as the
congregation point of the losers and hard knocks lifers. There was no place of refuge in this
place. Every moment was a fight to stay alive while the street criminals picked
on the weak to release their anger towards life. Johnny wasn’t a large man he
was small, thin and thus one of the targets of the beasts of the street
regularly.
Johnny had not heard from his father for months now and he had
no money or means to call him and he didn’t want to call him anyway. Though he
was a man he felt abandoned by his father who still lived with great riches.
His feelings of anger and frustration grew while his hunger grew and that trash
bits didn’t help to relieve.
Eventually Johnny felt hunger like he had never felt before
and he as sure he may die if he didn’t eat a meal. As he watched the male
prostitutes earning money along the street he became hungry enough to pick up
his own trick. Johnny didn’t have a problem having sex with men he swung both
ways anyway.
His first trick was a man who had money that Johnny smelled
as he entered his car. Johnny spent some time trying to convince him he was a
young boy who needed his help asking the man to take him home with him and take
care of him. If all he had to do
was give him sex for a good life this was something Johnny was easily willing
to do. But when Johnny was done blowing the trick he kicked him out of his car
and he went tumbling into the road while a few Deutsche marks fluttered on top
of him.
Johnny slowly picked himself up and counted the money thrown
at him; at least it was enough to get something to eat. For a moment Johnny was
pleased with himself again. He walked over a few blocks to a sandwich shop and
ate hungrily tapping his fingers against the crumbs as they fell to the table
from the toasted bread.
In time Johnny got used to this life and realized that prostituting
himself was easy. He even used some of his money to buy little girl outfits
that escalated his profits with the tricks that came to the area. He tried
regularly to get one of the wealthier tricks to take him home and take care of
him but they all refused and sometimes he was beaten by the tricks for asking.
Though Johnny got used to this life he was not resigned to
live this life forever and he was determined to find a way to make it big
still. The music industry had spit
on him and he was definitely going to get revenge and make it big in the
industry. But for now though he
wasn’t sure how he was going to be able to do it he was sure in time he could
come up with the right plan.
